I'm not saying Game of Thrones is perfect show, nor am I saying that there weren't some moments that were so disturbing and distasteful that I considered not continuing to watch. But when taken as a whole, over more than six seasons (just barely, as of last night), I'd say there were more fun moments than cringe-worthy ones. And over those 6+ seasons, I started to get a little obsessed with the show, as is my nature - I read all the books between seasons 4 and 5, and then prior to this season, I re-watched (most of) the show and tracked all the storylines in a color-coded document, for my own amusement and edification. If only there were a career path where I could put some of these skills to use. Oh, right, there is: TV producer. Anybody want to see my Emmy (certificate)?
Anyway, let's look back at the Season 7 premiere and see how each scene falls into place when considering the larger arc for each story:
WARNING: SPOILERS AND ADULT CONTENT AHEAD!!!
Scene 0. (Cold Open) Arya finishes off the Freys
My color-coding system technically tracks characters, not storylines per se, although Arya Stark has had her own storyline since Season 1, when her father Ned allowed her to pursue her own interests (i.e. water dancing) rather than forcing her to conform to established gender roles. Side note: Ned had his own storyline in Season 1 (for which I used Dark Green), which was then continued by his eldest son Robb in the next two seasons (since his main reason for becoming King in the North was to avenge his father), all the way up through the Red Wedding - which was prominently featured in this week's Prev On segment. In this direct reversal of the Red Wedding to start this season, Arya makes use of the class levels of Assassin she gained while working for the Faceless Men to impersonate the (literally) late Lord Walder Frey and lure all his kinsmen to their poison-induced doom. Then, after she unmasks, Mission: Impossible style, Arya delivers an updated version of House Stark's words: "Winter came for House Frey," or as it will surely be parodied in the Game of Bones porn parody: "Winter came... ALL OVER House Frey!"
Scene 1. Bran and Meera arrive at Castle Black
This scene exists pretty much just to showcase the special effects on the army of the dead (now with giants!) and to reassure viewers that Brandon Stark will in fact appear in this season (he sat out all of Season 5 while he was gaining class levels in Druid with the Three-Eyed Raven). Oh, also to remind us that "Dolorous" Edd Tollett is now in charge of the Night's Watch. Side note: did anyone else think they were gonna do a gag where Edd bumped his head on the gate as he turned to go back into the tunnel under the Wall?
Scene 2: Sansa disagrees with (but respects) Jon's style of leadership
If only there were a song about being reunited and it feeling so good, it could be the theme song for the combination of Jon Snow and Sansa Stark's storyline into one. I counted this one as a Jon scene because the main content revolved around Jon making decisions in his capacity as King in the North; or at least "all the LIVING North." Most of the subtext occurred during the second part of the scene, a sidebar between Jon and Sansa, which also provides some good "Uncle/Father" fodder for the Arrested Westeros Twitter account.
Scene 3: Cersei refuses Euron's marriage proposal
This scene is also split into two parts. In the first part, Cersei Lannister-Baratheon (is she still technically Baratheon after Robert died?) recaps all her enemies and Jaime Lannister posits that they desperately need some allies. (Jaime gets his own color for all those episodes he was off with Brienne and then later Bronn... all the B characters.) Then in part two, Cersei rejects one of those potential allies, Euron Greyjoy (uncle of Theon), who offers a marriage proposal, "a thousand ships, and two good hands." He's off to find a suitable present for the Queen, which will probably involve bad news for the Starks in one way or another.
Scene 4: Sam gains access to Oldtown's restricted area
In the first episode where Oldtown is featured on the Main Title Map, everyone's favorite future maester Samwell Tarly stars in his very own training montage! After emptying more buckets of shit than should be allowed to be shown on cable television, Sam sweet talks his maester-mentor into letting him into the adult section of the Oldtown library so he can do his part to fight the incoming zombie apocalypse... with KNOWLEDGE! Side note: I enjoyed seeing Jim Broadbent make his first GoT appearance if only because it gives me the excuse to make the case that he should play Tom Bombadil in the long-awaited spinoff of the Lord of the Rings films...
Scene 5. Brienne distrusts Littlefinger
Even though Brienne of Tarth has her own storyline in my color-coding system (she took over Catelyn Stark's storyline since Brienne is oath-bound to carry on Cat's main mission in life: to protect the Stark children), I gave this scene to Sansa because she's the one making the decision to let Littlefinger stay in Winterfell. Sansa rightly points out that "Littlefinger saved us," but she neglects to mention that the saving came after he sold her out to the Boltons and all but promised to deliver her head on a spike to Cersei Lannister. (That was in Episode 506, Scene 5, although it wasn't featured in the Prev On.)
Scene 6. Arya camps with some Lannister soldiers
We've already seen Arya at her most badass, so this scene really only exists as a vehicle for an Ed Sheeran cameo (who I wouldn't have recognized had my wife not been sitting next to me, mostly ignoring the show as I watched). I did, however, recognize the song he was singing, as it was one of my favorite lines of verse in the book series.
Scene 7. The Hound sees a vision in the flames
Sandor Clegane is the protagonist of the newest storyline in the series, as he only started getting his own scenes to carry 7 episodes into Season 6. He was an important character prior to that, but his scenes were always subsumed by more important characters: specifically Sansa when she was at King's Landing, and then Arya when he took her captive and tried to sell her for ransom. But now it looks like the Hound is not only getting over his fear of fire, but he's also joining the fight against evil in earnest.
Scene 8. Sam learns there is dragonglass on Dragonstone
OK, that's what HAPPENS in the scene - it's a callback to Scene 2 when Jon starts his meeting by telling everyone to keep their eyes open for any dragonglass (i.e. obsidian) they can find because of its use against White Walkers. But the main revelation in this scene (as predicted by Ozzy Man in his review of the Season 7 trailer) is that Jorah Mormont (who never really had his own storyline) has not yet found a cure for his greyscale and is slowly but surely turning into a stone man. Tough break for Jorah the Explorer...
Scene 9. Daenerys arrives at Dragonstone
This scene consists of only one line of dialogue (not counting the SEAGULLS SCREECHING and DRAGONS SCREECHING descriptives that appear in the closed captions), but it's tremendously significant in the Game of Thrones timeline, as it represents the end of Daenerys Targaryen's journey from across the Narrow Sea to her ancestral home on Dragonstone... the very same dragonglass-rich Dragonstone that is the title of this week's episode! Also of note, her entourage includes prime mover/shaker Tyrion Lannister, and they arrived using ships provided by Theon and Yara Greyjoy. And Khaleesi also unveils another gem in her collection of Going Out Tops, the original backronym for GoT.
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